Close Your Eyes

What do you see when you close your eyes? And I don't mean, close 'close', like closing your eyes to sleep. I mean, like blinking, a second's worth of closing. Well, correct me if I'm wrong, most likely the answer is...nothing.

We blink and what we see in that split second is, well, darkness if we even realize that. Sometimes if you squeeze your eyes real hard for a while, you can actually see weird zigzaggy lines of colours (well, I see them sometimes). But that's not what I'm talking about.

The reason why I'm bringing this topic up is because I keep seeing things when I blink. It's hard to explain and many people would say it's just my imagination but anyone who knows my family's history would understand.

Both sides of my family have dealt with spirits, the supernatural, etc. We've seen ghosts, been plagued by spirits, and had even witnessed someone get possessed. I myself have had two encounters; one by sight and one by sound. But lately, I've been seeing things that, while they don't scare me, does make me wonder why they appear, especially when they have no connection whatsoever with what I'm thinking or talking at that point in time. Heck, sometimes I'm not even thinking about anything.

The first one I remember 'seeing' was a few years back when I was praying. The image was so vivid that I remember every detail even until now. It was twilight in a dark open field. There was a great big tree and underneath it, just a few feet away, was a freshly dug, empty grave. Standing right behind the grave was a 'penunggu' (spirit) with a hood covering its face, looking straight at me. The way it stood, the way it looked at me, I got the impression that the grave was mine and that it was waiting for me. I saw all that within one second and it scared the hell out of me.

The second one I remember 'seeing' is one that I keep seeing over and over; a young girl with shoulder-length straight hair, parted in the middle, looking right at me. The weird thing about her is that I can only see her from the shoulder up, like she's standing right infront of me. But that's not all. The freaky thing is her face keeps turning from human to skeleton. One time I'll see her face and the next, I'll see her skull but with a semi-transparent image of her face over it.

After that, I didn't see anything anymore and I thought, 'Hey, must be my overactive imagination'...until a week ago. This one is really creepy. A dried-up corpse of a woman with holes in her eyes sprawled diagonally over some sort of black furniture, her head almost touching the black ground, her face turned to me. And when I say holes in her eyes, I don't mean blank sockets. I mean, real eyes but with actual holes carved in them.

Yeah, yeah, I know. 'Aslina, you're being paranoid. It's just your usual imagination going berserk.' Well, I will never know. All I know is that I'm writing this down because early this evening, I saw another one and this time, it's a coffin. Thank God I didn't see anything in it.

You're Actually Reading This?

Call me ignorant, call me weird, but until today, I never thought that people actually read my blog. Yeah, yeah, I can hear you saying, 'But, Aslina, your blog is public. Of course people will read it if they see it'. But I never thought that my blog is interesting enough to make people want to spend time to wade through it. I mean, it's all just babble and personal opinions, experiences and stuff. It's not like I'm writing a new theory on galactic time-travelling, or how pink socks go so well with white shoes, or Britney Spears's latest weird antics.

I used to keep diaries which I write in whenever I have something sad, happy or special to relate. But with technology, blogging was born and I converted from written paper to typed webpage. However, the major difference in my diary and my blog is the content. My diary is more of a personal day-to-day happenings while my blogs are more on my thoughts of life, hence the title 'A Malaysian Life'.

When I first discovered blogging and how people from everywhere can gain access to it, I decided to blog only on general not-likely-to-get-trashed issues, and I decided to do it all anonymously (I had a blog elsewhere using a nickname). Why? Because people tend to misunderstand or misconstrue what is written and they tend to use the written word against the writer (just because it's black and white), which usually ensues a giant fight later on (and in some cases, legal proceedings). But now, I decided 'What the heck?'. In this age and time where people say whatever whenever, I might as well practice my so-called freedom of speech. My logic is if people can say hurtful things to my face, then I can write hurtful things to their webpages. That doesn't make much sense, I know, but then again, when do I make actual sense? Hehe.

But thanks all the same for reading. I know you receive e-mails from Friendster whenever someone updates their blog, but for you to actually click the blog link and read the entry from start to finish is not something everyone would do. So from the bottom of my heart, thank you for reading.